It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
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