Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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