home. puking in laundry basket.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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