She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
