Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
