so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
