There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
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