I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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