You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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