Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
