somebody snuck up and got me drunk
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
My vagina is very pro this idea
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize