Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize