seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize