I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
