I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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