yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
