Texts From Last Night

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  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.

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  (857): Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time. http://tfl.nu/rsq1
  Replies (5) Good night (1415) Bad night (460)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.

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  (334): Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies. http://tfl.nu/fldh
  Replies (50) Good night (2921) Bad night (981)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?

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  (571): is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided? http://tfl.nu/vrm3
  Replies (8) Good night (3311) Bad night (959)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.

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  (216): He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract. http://tfl.nu/wrx8
  Replies (26) Good night (690) Bad night (2908)
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?

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  (709): so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much? http://tfl.nu/jwju
  Replies (23) Good night (7187) Bad night (1022)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.

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  (780): we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said. http://tfl.nu/m7ps
  Replies (22) Good night (1167) Bad night (2670)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  running late. just ran over a dude on a bike

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  (813): running late. just ran over a dude on a bike http://tfl.nu/e4pf
  Replies (52) Good night (2166) Bad night (8151)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.

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  (612): three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left. http://tfl.nu/3pzj
  Replies (9) Good night (7604) Bad night (780)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you

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  (419): you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you http://tfl.nu/zo5g
  Replies (7) Good night (4016) Bad night (1188)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.

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  (704): He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza. http://tfl.nu/a4a2
  Replies (8) Good night (1030) Bad night (2819)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.

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  (615): Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours. http://tfl.nu/ireg
  Replies (4) Good night (2106) Bad night (654)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.

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  (919): It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed. http://tfl.nu/521h
  Replies (9) Good night (3177) Bad night (1195)
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  (347): View more from New York

  THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.

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  (347): THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI. http://tfl.nu/yt9w
  Replies (4) Good night (520) Bad night (507)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.

  (469): View more from Texas

  BP at your house from now on.

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  (214): NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off. (469): BP at your house from now on. http://tfl.nu/i1e8
  Replies (0) Good night (621) Bad night (241)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.

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  (281): We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron. http://tfl.nu/cli2
  Replies (1) Good night (397) Bad night (208)

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