I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.