Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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