You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
