That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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