Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
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