no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Randomize
