Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Randomize
