I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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