belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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