and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
