We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We had sex on a dog bed..
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
