You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
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