I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
