FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
