my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize