No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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