i just wanna soil my oats bro
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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