I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i will never coherently bang her
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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