About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
