What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize
