So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
