i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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