I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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