Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
