I got her a Nickelback box set.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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