i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
