never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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