Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize