69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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