Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Randomize
