A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
