Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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