i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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