So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize
